A New Financial Scheme

Sunday, April 27, 2008 |

So here is a random thought I had tonight whilst watching Our Mutual Friend(an old BBC miniseries). Why on EARTH don't I make people pay me for information??? This is an industry I totally need to get into.

Me telling people crap=big bucks. How can this be a bad idea? I have sooo much information on my hands that could be put to good use paying off student loans and my credit card. Look at this dude. He is an actor named David Bradley. He is Filch in the Harry Potter movies and he was also in the BBC version of Vanity Fair(sooooo good). He inevitable gets paid off for giving info to investigators or blackmailers in every movie he is in.

He just looks like you need to pay him 20 bucks to go away and take his smell with him.......if not 100 bucks for info and then to go away with his bad self.

Is it my creepy factor? Do I not look like I have the kind of seedy info that people need to pay me for? On TV, PI's constantly pay people for dishing info. I really want to get in on that action.

Maybe I need to move to a city that has docks. Dallas has a shocking lack of waterfront sleaze property where info is bought and sold. Maybe working downtown on Harry Hines when I start at Children's will help me to enter the "lucrative info" industry. That is about the seediest location I can go.

I think I need to into a higher class level of info sales if you get my drift. For my own safety as well as I don't want to have to cultivate a smell. I see all kinds of suburban stuff and I've kept my mouth shut up till now. I think Plano and Frisco have no idea the resource I could be if I was paid well. Cha-ching! You have no idea the kind of drama I see at the Coit and 190 Walmart after 12 on a Saturday night... when the truly evil pick up food for Sunday potlucks. And you can find out about who I've seen there for only $20 (per person, some restrictions apply, 20 for 1st minute, and 48.95 for each addtl. minute).

Who danced with who at the dance you didn't go to? ( oh yes...I know..... and I also know YOU were not there ...and by YOU I mean .....everyone I know pretty much).

Who sat by who the Sunday you were out of town?( Yes, you could ask someone else, but ask yourself....who pays more attention this stuff ME or someone else??? I rest my case)

I foresee grand sums of money coming my way, Gold Doubloons, Kohl's Cards, Sweet Sweet Cash.

Erica's Sweet Info Hook-up is now Open for Bid'ness. And no I don't take credit cards.

Hey peeps. I had another bizarre dream last night (besides the Ashlee Simpson one) that I don't really remember, but it woke me up and I remember thinking to myself. I need to blog on this. Tryouts. Call lists. How did I HATE them and how glad am I to not have tryouts like that now.

Living in Texas, I tried out for my fair share of stuff. I was in choir in elementary school but that was no stress. That came in Junior High. I think the reason I had an unnatural hatred of tryouts is that looking back- I got shafted. A LOT! I tried out for Athletics in seventh grade. I made more baskets than anyone. I smoked them all in volleyball. I had a history of playing softball, soccer, and gymnastics. I think my one weakness is that I didn't run as fast as some other girls( I HATE running for no reason) but I was like top 3 on every other category. YET- somehow I didn't make it. Thinking back now I know something fishy went on. But it started my hatred of tryouts. Then came Tennis tryouts(don't even ask) and endless orchestra sectionals(at least they were over quickly) and UIL performances, and then the mother of them all......drill team tryouts. Like 3 years of them. Kill me now. I think of drill team every time I hear Garth Brooks singing Unanswered Prayers. One of God's greatest gifts was not making drill team. Amen Hallelujah. I am grateful every day. The teacher was angry at the judges for picking crappy dancers their daughters knew and I was all up in arms, but now I am like....THANK YOU NEPOTISM!!!

Looking back it seems like I was constantly being put on public trial. I am SOOO glad I am over that now. I mean I have awful job interviews and other hard things in life, but nothing that compares with having a week of drill team camp followed by teenage girl in life/death anxiety during the actual tryouts.

It seems like now as an adult I would be better equipped to deal with that type of stress. It's sad to think how much I worried about things that I now have so much perspective on. It is also bizarre to think how much of life it determined when we are young and don't know what we are doing. I mean....what if I HAD made athletics and thought that my gift in life was sports? How many of my nerdy pursuits would I have never even had time to try? Or thinking the opposite way....if I had been in sports would I be in better shape now? Hahaa.

Oh no wait. Crap I played soccer in high school. I guess I have no excuse other than laziness.

But anyways.....I was having some deep thoughts. Maybe I would be on my toes a bit more about life in general as an adult if I had those constant public humiliation opportunities like I did back in school. Or do the public humiliations and competitive atmosphere keep us from gaining maturity? Hmmmm. A thinker.

All I know is that my lazy easily-stressed out self appreciates no one making me show them what I can really do in front of my peers. So I probably don't have opportunities to shine but I am also saved from publicly tanking. Ahhhhhh sweet mediocrity. I salute thee.

OK apparently my dreams have themes or something. Last night was a fabulously wierd one.

Let us jet back in time to about 6 years ago. I was in the imaginary version of the stake center that I often visit in my dreams(the one with a ladies locker room) and I was like BFFs with Ashlee Simpson before she hit it big.

So I am all......girl.....I heard the PERFECT song for you to sing. When I heard it I though this is perfect for Ashlee's voice. It will rock so hard.

And Ashlee is all...really? How does it go?

And I sing in a total monotone: All my girls stand in a circle and clap your hands ....this is for you. Ups and downs, highs and lows no matter what you see me through"

And Ashlee is all.....um....OK. Maybe I need to hear the original version.

And I'm all...TRUST ME it is a song and not the spoken word....just wait till the chorus. So I start in on the LO-LO-LOVE's and she's all yeah....Erica...I'm not so sure about that. It doesn't sound like a song or anything ...like maybe Frankenstein is singing it.

And I am all.....Ashlee I promise you if you do it - you will be a star!!!

So anyways. I then leave her and go into the massive locker room and think to myself. Holy COW!!! Did I just sing the ugliest most nonmelodic line in the world and tell Ashlee it made me think of her??!! Ooops. But I am sooo right. Her wierdo voice is the only one that can pull that off.

Tada. The end. So I sang bad but it was because it was an Ashlee Simpson song so you have to sing bad to get it to sound right.

A Singing Nightmare!

Friday, April 25, 2008 |

So last night I think I got my payback for squealing like a banshee at choir this past week.

I was apparently auditioning for the Nauvoo Musical Mission again. And I had prepared an audition tape like weeks before with someone playing accompaniment for me. I was listening to some other people's tapes and thinking to myself - ha- no way- I am sooo much better than these hacks. So then at the last minute I couldn't find my tape so I go searching everywhere frantically and other people were even helping me. I finally find the tape and of course then everyone wants to hear it. So I think it's gonna be simple and OK. I mean not fabulous but no major errors or anything.

So it starts playing......and I sound like the worst breathy voiced pitchy wanna-be american idol object of ridicule ever. I wanted to die. Then I spent the rest of my dream wondering how I could gracefully get out of auditioning when everyone already knew about it.

And I wondered to myself- Holy crap!! Do I need a hearing test cause how could I not know I sing like that???

So that's my nightmare. Probably actually a reality except for the Nauvoo part. Ug.


Thursday, April 24, 2008 |

I look totally identical to these people right? Ha! I got this from a facebook application a while back and I was like.....riiiiiight. But maybe a lot of people have really bad eyesight and I am the only one still 20/20.

I am getting inundated lately with people who swear that I am a clone of their friend, relative, child. It is getting mad crazy.

I have grown up with people saying I look like people ALL the time. My cousins would always tell me that I was a twin of their friend at school. My best friend's dad was seriously obsessed with me having my own TV show. He was convinced that I was secretly running off to Hollywood to star in the TV show Phenom about a girl who plays tennis( I tried to find a picture but the girl who played the star has NO pics on the Internet from back then- apparently even she is ashamed of what we looked like-rough). The period in life where I had braces was even worse because I looked like even more people probably.

This week at the hospital I had a patient's family absolutely determined that they knew me from somewhere. Then I have a nurse tell me I look just like a person she knows. They today I was at the mall and a girl at the Hallmark store was acting bizarrely and she said she suddenly gushes "YOU LOOK JUST LOOK MY SISTER IN LAW AND ITS FREAKING ME OUT!!!" She then tells me she had been following me around the store because initially she came up to say what the heck are you doing here and then realized I wasn't the sister in law and then flipped and decided to stalk me. Too funny. Props to her for honesty in the face of embarrassment.

So for reals. I had nicknames in Argentina for my celeb look alike and have had a bunch of friends over the years that have been obsessed with me being twinkies with people. What the heck?

This week the reassurances I keep having to give that I just have one of those faces have got me thinking....does everyone else have this problem? For reals. I wish I was dramatically beautiful with some trademark feature cause it's getting old to look like generic blond chick.

And you all KNOW I don't handle compliments well. Especially insincere ones!! Here is a little vignette from my life for your reading pleasure:

Friend1: "Freak Erica you totally look and sound exactly like Julia Stiles sometimes except..umm....you're much prettier"
Me: (Out loud) Ummmm.......Ok...Thanks. (In my head)- but fatter...go ahead and say what you mean...I do have eyes!

Argentinian Comp: Hermana I am so sick of the little kids calling you a teenage witch. I mean you look like her a little but geeez!! I know it annoys you so I will call you it too but you're not even close to a teenager. Hermana Sabrina the Old Witch. Muahahaaaaa.
Me: (all of it out loud)Thanks. How about the Old, Fat, and One Foot Taller Witch. It sounds even more charming.

oooooh....here's another fave.....let's transport back to junior high where it got truly depressing......

Friend's Family: Wow Erica you look just like Alicia Silverstone in that Aerosmith video where she's hitchhiking.
Me: Really?!!! But she's like way hot!!!
Friend's Family: I mean when she's hitch-hiking you just see her from behind. You both have that long blond hair and long legs. When she turns around not so much.
Me: oh. (knife twisting in heart)

So thank you friends and family for boosting my confidence over the years.
It's nice to know that I am almost attractive. Jerks.

Is it any wonder I like to have more red in my hair. At least when it's red I avoid more comparisons. Except for the one time this checkout dude at target(not JT) got all stalker-ey that I looked like Drew Barrymore back in college and wanted to come home with me. He must have been smoking the good stuff is all I can say. That's more than a stretch. That's a golden gate bridge there. I don't see it at all.

Anyways. I usually do find celebrities that I would cast as my friends if they made a movie of my life or something. Sometimes partially looks based but mostly they have mannerisms or personalities that remind me of my friends. I haven't found many people I would say have a body double or anything. Although I swear Kerry Marino Stiles could be related to Lisa LaPorta on Designed to Sell.

For instance let's see....off the top of my head....who have I cast.. I had a WHOLE lineup back in college.

Rhia you get to be Jennifer Elise Cox- the girl who is Jan in the Brady Movie. She totally reminds me of you. Teehee.
Jen - she does have a total look alike- she is Mary Alice on Ace of Cakes
Alison- I might cast Minnie Driver as you. She has sarcasm down.
Molly- I might cast Parker Posey- I am still considering
Erin C.- hmmm.......i know I had someone in the past now I can't remember for the life of me. Maybe Katherine Heigl. A nice tall girl :)
Aibi- well ....there is a funny asian girl on ace of cakes but she lacks the proper personality and energy I think. Maybe we'll pretend Aibi' has an accent and is 1/2 latina and not asian and cast America Ferrera.

Travis- there's a guy in a Verizon commercial right now who walks out of his house with the network following him. I just thought he looked like Travis the minute I saw the commercial.
Sam- maybe you can be the dude in rent. Anthony Rapp on IMDB. Red hair! Score. I had to think on that.
Steven Foulkes - assuming I make this movie a few years down the road..... I might cast one of the twins from the Suite Life with Zack and Cody. One tries to woo ladies and talks just like Steven. Hehee.
Nate- Steven Fry. Totally. Without the British accent he could be an older Nate.

I'm sure I have more.....I just can't think right now. Guys just aren't easy. I tend to only cast people I've dated cause it's easier. And then retroactively and either maliciously or sentimentally. Although I have to say I really don't feel as if I've actually dated a young Tommy Lee Jones or Patrick Wilson. Nor do I really see myself with a TLJ or PW. Ok maybe PW. That man is fine and he sings....mmmm. But I cast him to play my ex and not himself in which case...uh ...nooo. Maybe this is part of why I'm single. I'm dating the wrong actors. Hahaa.

Wow this is making my brain hurt. I really haven't played this game since college. And I mean the other time I went to college. We had sooo much time on our hands back then. We had an American cast and a British cast. wow.

My sister gets an old casting idea- she was always the girl who plays Stephanie Tanner on Full House when we were kids. I'd have to see what she looks like now. I think my sister deserves a recast after all this time. Maybe Blake Lively from Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants.

Ok I have procrastinated not doing my online standardized tests long enough.
Please feel free to leave a plethora of comments. I want to see your casting ideas. Or comments on my annoyance with my own appearance. Whatever.

Spicing Up My Bloggy Yet Again

Tuesday, April 22, 2008 |

So here's a new new format. I like that I have more space for the posts to show. I was getting annoyed with the other one being too narrow to read easily.

Now my prob is that I need time to figure stuff out. I want to put in a logo with my title so it has a better font etc. I also somehow lost the top navigation bar to go and directly create posts and sign in etc. Ooops. I got a little delete happy taking out art and logos I didn't want. I still have homework to do and the hospital tomorrow. YIKES. I don't have time to figure it all out now.

I had to go to the social security office today to get a replacement card because mine has been lost for a while now. Here's a fun little scenario for you. You come in and go to a computer and get a number. Then you wait to go to the window ......for HOURS. Is there paperwork and required documentation? Of course. But you don't recieve it or find out the requirements till they call you to the window. So basically everyone spends a TON of time at the window as the person watches them do paperwork and they dig and beg and plead because they don't have their stuff.

In my case I had the form pre-done online and I knew what documents I needed. My issue was- do I have to pay a fee and if so is it cash only? Was this info anywhere - NO. Did I want to wait 3 hours to get a yes or no question answered? NO. But I stayed anyways and I figured I was in a better place than 99% of the others there without the correct IDs.

Turns out it's free. I shall be receiving my card shortly. Hallelujah.

BTW while I was there bored out of my mind I played with my phone and on the Blackberry news page there was something about a version of Guitar Hero for the Blackberry!!! Thinking about how that would work logistically makes my brain hurt. Bizarre. I will have to check into that when I have time later. Also I accidentally set my phone off with Fergie singing Barracuda REALLY loud and nothing would stop it or turn down the volume. I couldn't even get my phone to turn off. The horror! I was just trying to google an area code to see what state had tried to call me. Who would expect my phone to jump to Fergie?!! Nothing like some crazy loud guitar into the silence.

This is just a valuable lesson for all of those who message and play online at church. Your phone could have a brain fart and start playing Barracuda in sacrament and then you'll be sorry.

I write so much for the ladies......today I was inspired to give a little love to the fellas.

Holy Schnikies!!

Now in Bed, Bath, & Beyond's current mailer. Use your 10$ off coupon to save even more!

I wonder if this product can be used to shave others' backs against their will from a distance? Possibly a must have purchase for summer vacations.

Also- I wonder if the product insipired the man to curl his hair under or if he was already a little femme. (it's hard to tell from the scan but it IS a real person)

Teeeheeee. I just can't stop laughing.

Some days it's good to be me

Monday, April 21, 2008 |

So this post was suggested by my sister as one of her favorite parts of Zoo Day.

As we are waiting in the long line to eat on the patio at Joe T's, we got to hear all kinds of lovely super intelligent conversation. There was a couple in front of us with a preppy frat boy guy and his plastic wife. Both mid 30's at a guess but she's dressing like she is on the Pussycat Dolls Wanna-be show. So as we are waiting 2 other couples join them. Each of the men seemingly pretty funny and grasping at their former frat boy glory. The women.......holy cow. Every one of those girls had a fake rack and chiclet teeth and fake tan and nails and bared bellies and not an intelligent thought in their heads. And every one of them was dressed in hoochie gear for the 18 year old Rihanna wanna-be. I would almost say Fergie wanna be, but I hesitate to bestow that rare honor. (For Alison's enjoyment- I think they each had a different faux camo hat on! In their mid 30's - it was priceless!)

My immediate thought was that the girls MUST work together. And you can guess where I think they work too. Ha. But anyways the real fun was listening to their stupid conversations. WOW! Woweeewowow.

One was mortally afraid of a bee and ran off shrieking. Then the asian collagen queen gets in to deep thoughts about bee stings and how she's never had one. Then she proceeds to quiz everyone about bee stings. For a long time. A lot of WOW and OMG's with wide eyes and pursed lips. Bees are so harsh. Oooooooo.

So then her man is all- I'm going to the bar to get a drink while we wait. So he offers to get stuff for everyone and he asks her and she says she wants a toothpick. I am thinking to myself....is this a new drink I haven't heard of? No she literally wanted a toothpick. So she proceeded to pick at her gums until they bled profusely with her toothpick. And used the blood covered toothpick in conversation to point and gesture and then went back to pickin away -I seriously got a little nauseous. As did everyone in her group I think. Her hubby made himself scarce the minute he gave her the offending object. He must have known what was coming.

Watching her sit there thinking she was the queen of cool and have bleeding gums and a nasty old toothpick was priceless. SO GROSS!! She will never be a Pussycat with that gross personal habit. I can't believe her man is still with her after watching that display. (Which- FYI Kris- while you were washing your hands ....he and the other one in the polo tried to start talking to me cause one of the girls had asked me a question and suddenly I must have seemed like an oasis in the desert. The girls lost interest after I answered them and the guys were all HELLO, but I was all....um....I think not !! They seemed very disappointed when I clammed up and they had to listen to their wives again. SUCKAS- you married the airheads- have fun with that!!!)

So that is my other story from Zoo Day. My lack of silicone, collagen, microdermabrasion, self-absorption, cancer, functional illiteracy and laxatives was never so much on comparison in one day. Boy did I come out the winner!!! Go normal girls! Wheeee! I know the guys wanna get wit that!!! Brain cells are the new black. OH SNAP!

Surprise!!! I Heart Animals!!! Who Knew??

Saturday, April 19, 2008 |

Today's blog comes to you after one of those fabulous sunny Saturdays you dream about all winter. I have been craving a visit to the zoo and the stars lined up and fates collided etc. so my sister and I went today- on the most beautiful day ever. PERFECT. sigh. Hot enough to tan but not to sweat. C'est Magnifique.

So here's me with the flamingos. These were the less smelly flamingos(but not "lesser flamingos" if you are a flamingo connosieur- the lessers were the smellies- one wonders if their name comes from a depressive reaction to their name or the name from the smell/size ...a whole chicken/egg debate could ensue I am sure)

Here's my sister at a total photo op I found. Hello perfect framing??!! I am the bomb. What a supermodel.

Here's my fave aminal (yes that is what I call them sometimes because they like baby names- it makes them feel loved- just like sometimes I say paskettios because that makes them taste better). Isn't he a beautiful creature!!!! I want to pet his velvety fur and hear him purr like a kitty and call him Mr. Knightly!! Except he would devour me. Slight flaw in hugging furry aminal plan.

Here we see a hungry hungry hippo! He was hungry for both food and love if you get my drift. His mate was getting worn out with swimming away from him. See the blob in front of him-fat hippo legs pedaling under water as swiftly as possible. That's her with a headache, dirty hair, work, family visiting this weekend. He is either clueless or very persistent. Poor hippette.

And here we have the "Chargrilled Aging Porn Star with Beginning Stage Emphysema on Obligatory Day out with Angelically Cute Progeny". She was walking along screaming and cussing in the loudest 2 pack a day voice possible. Angel Child: Mommy- wewe's the wion? CAPS: Somewhere else right now- maybe in his den. AC: Wewe's de Den? CAPS: HOW THE %^%&SHOULD I KNOW JUST MOVE TO THE NEXT ANIMAL!!!! MOVE THE #&^$#& ALONG OR I SWEAR I'LL&@*& DRAG YOU @&#(@#& GET YOUR @*#@*#&*@ MOVING!!!!!

Notice her natural coat. The FFF Cup size bra with completely see-through tank. The natural stance of the CAPS is tilted slightly forward as the front of her is too heavy for her torso to support.

Since I blacked out her face for privacy's sake you cannot see that fact that her face is that of a 50 year old. SOOO BURNT OUT FROM TANNING. ICK. I wish it had been her grandchild but it wasn't.

There are many more animal pics. I heart them so. I love all the furry ones. Not so much the feathery ones or the scaly ones. Definitely not the creepy crawlies. I really really love the mammalian in water ones, but you gotta go to SeaWorld to see them. How I love sea lions and otters! And dolphins. sigh. As with all trips to anywhere to see animals I want to bring them home with me and cuddle with them or set them free from their prisons. It makes me depressed to see them in stinky small habitats bored out of their minds. Then again they could be in Argentina either running free and attacking visitors or practically in a kennel. Don't even get me started on that zoo. Stupid mean monkey. I wanted to eat that peach. I still want it back. Jerk.

Anyways. Here's my zoo day. I also ate on the patio at Joe T. Garcia's and had a virgin margarita and fajitas. What a perfect day. Then I went to my fabulous former roomie's bachelorette and ate cupcakes and saw my friends I haven't seen in a long time. So fun!! And now I will go off to bed all toasty and tired from spending the day in the sun. Bliss!!! Oh, that all Saturdays could be so perfect!

I was going to write something brilliant but...

Thursday, April 17, 2008 |

For some dumb reason I have been getting all of these errors on Blogger lately. It's driving me insane. I wanted to write a blog with a picture today but i'm sorry blogger won't let me upload pictures right now. GRrrrrrrrr!!! Now I am trying to think of something else to write about but I am still focused on the bloggie that never was.

Also I am annoyed that facebook's RSS won't feed still. Stupid people and their stupid broken applications.

I am racking my brain for cute anecdotes but unfortunately I have had almost no human contact lately. I am homework and study obsessed right now. I have barely left my room except to work at the hospital or take tests the past 2 weeks. Only 3 more and I'm done though. To express my emotions right now would be something close to the Flight of the Conchords "The Humans are Dead". 0010110101111010

Actually I need to go write an essay right now. Ahhhh procrastination.

Hmmm.....To Read or not to Read?

Monday, April 14, 2008 |

So I watched the Memory Keeper's Daughter(a new Lifetime movie) tonight after I got home. I had been recommended the book by my grandma last summer but her buddies never gave her copy back and I forgot about it. A month back I remembered about it and put it on hold at the library. So when did I get a call about it being in? Saturday night!!

The movie was on this weekend but I DVR'd it since I was working at the hospital. I picked up the book today, but now I am wondering...do I want to read it? I already watched the movie and it was just OK. Dermot Mulroney and Gretchen Mol are now on my short list of actors who cannot act extremes of emotion. Watching her give birth and cry and him cry ......ACK!! So bad!! I am wondering... since that started out the movie on a bad note, did it prejudice me?

Anyone read it that can give me comments? I feel like I need more detail about the characters to really attach myself to the story. Was this version shortened?

Ug. What a disappointment. I wanted a good cryfest and nada.

In other good news I also picked up my hold for the DVD of The Mayor of Casterbridge BBC movie. Wheeeee! I heart Ciaran Hinds. I hope this is good for my movie and study time tomorrow. I find that BBC movies of literary classics are like Pizza. Even a bad one is still good.

In my never-ending quest to survive the writers' strike, I started renting an old Hugh Laurie series a few weeks ago from the library. It's called Jeeves and Wooster. If you enjoy him as house, this will give you an ENTIRELY different picture of him. I already knew he was a loon from watching Black Adder, but in this series his Bertie Wooster is so cute! He has rosy cheeks dang it! Who knew?

If you hear me saying " I say, I say" or "dashed bad luck" later on it's his fault.

Spicing up my Bloggy


So.......I haven't had a chance to even breathe in DAYS so what's the first thing I do when I finally get a break from nursing tonight? I decided to update the look of my blog and add subjects and links.

What do you think? Too girly? Do you like the pseudo Erica girl with the shades?

I heart it for now. I hope I don't get sick of it. Who knows what crazy things I will get up to when I really have more free time in May!!

PS- I HATE programming. Just an FYI. As big a math and science nerd as I am, programming is just NOT my bag.

A Mo-Tab Carol

Tuesday, April 8, 2008 |

So ....ummmm.....maybe I shouldn't admit this but we all do it so let's come out with it.

I shamelessly people watch during the musical numbers at conference. I have names for my regular favorites. There's :

my friend's Dad with the mustache
silver cloud of hair lady
token black dude
pretty asian lady
really attached to her long hair lady
new young guy with auschwitz cheekbones

I'll just keep some more of these to myself as they really are pretty bad.

Anyways I am not one of those people who have a lifelong dream to sing with MoTab. Maybe this is linked with not wanting to go to the Y either. But right before conference someone asked me if I planned to move to Utah one day to sing with MoTab. I was all Heck to the No. SCANDALOUS!! But then I thought about it. And moving to Utah? Still a pretty big no. But Everyone knows a girl's gotta sing. And ward choir just doesn't cut it once you've sang dissonant operatic stuff.... the virus invades your system. I am managing the sickness right now because I just don't have time, but in the future? Who knows?

My true dream is to sing with Andre Rieu's orchestra if I was to abandon all for being in a choir. Then I could travel the world in pretty ballgowns and sing REALLY difficult classical and pop songs. And be in with an orchestra again without the stress of my own mediocre viola playing. My mouth is watering right now so I'll stop. But anyways...that's not likely to happen.

Look at this orchestra!! See the piddy ballgowns in bright colors!!! I am so there!!

But moving back to MoTab. Supposing I caved and moved and joined? This is where is gets all crazy surreal......

Who would I be? Cause you know everyone gets watched. I'm not sure I am up to that kind of attention/ridicule of my appearance. And moving to Utah will obviously start to affect my fashion sense and my hair will show it. Suddenly it was like I was seeing a ghost of MoTab future. This could be you Erica!!! Big Bangs but Flat Haired Dark Circles Under Her Eyes Chick!! oooohhhooooohhhoohhh!!! clank rattle.

Is anyone really ready to join MoTab? Yikes. Not me!

Not if there are people like me watching!! It's so much more complicated than just being able to rock Mack Wilberg arragements of hymns.

Ok.......I may have been born in Cali but I have been in Texas for all of my school since 1st grade. My formative years are Texan. I love my state. I love barbeque. I love bluebonnets. I love the Alamo. I love Braums. I went to Texas A&M.....arguably the biggest cowboy school in existance. I don't really speak with an accent unless I try, but when I let it out I can sound truly Texan baby with a southern draaaaawl.

Why is this important to know? Because I am honestly embarrased that the Polygamists came to Texas. When I go to the CNN webpage and see that they are reporting from the San Angelo area it makes me a little nauseous. Why did the wierdos have to come to my beau-tee-ful state and pollute it? And give all the Baptists more ammo for the next Mormons are goin to HELL sermon. As if they didn't preach enough false doctrine about us already!!! ARGG!!!!!

This is the state of the independent soul. The free spirit! We used to be another country dang it!! We still as a state have wayyy more authority over what happens here due to the terms of the treaty when we became a part of the US.
In short.....TEXAS ROCKS!!

Polygamy ...Doesn't rock. Warren Jeffs is scary gross. Yuck. Shudder. As an actual Latter Day Saint I don't have any sympathy for the fundamentalists' gross male leaders forcing 13 yr olds to marry middle aged men. That's child abuse straight up. In fact I am confused that they didn't just completely change their church's name when they broke off!! HONESTLY PEOPLE!!! And yet as a Latter Day Saint, they feel like I should be shamed into feeling sympathy or something since we had polygamy in our shared past so long ago. I admit I feel a kinship with those girls in long skirts-since I wear sleeves and knee shorts. That's about all. I feel sympathy for any religion with extreme tenets for the followers' daily life or a history of persecution due to my own family history and beliefs. Down at Texas A&M we learned alot about Judaism at our Institute of Religion because our director was close friends with the Rabbi. We had a great friendship with the Jewish Students. I had a Hindu friend growing up. And some hard-core catholic girls. People who really live their religion tend to be my friends regardless of what religion it is.

I have to say though......polygamy is a controversial topic for LDS people. They're hitting us right where it hurts. We can't deny that our ancestors practiced it. We haven't been polygamists now for over a century. And we believe in obeying our national laws. And it's against the law here. Who even cares about the law- I don't think we would arrange underage marriages or wear pioneer clothes and live in connecting trailers in any case. At least I shall never do such a thing. That's the fundamentalists own invention.

The truly appalling part is the forced marriages of underage girls -that is the most heinous part and the part that is most totally NOT from any shared mormon past. How on EARTH could any one say that is OK??!! Marriage is by choice. Anyone who is forcing people to do anything- especially underage girls- is NOT practicing any type of belief system that is based on the same things I believe. Individual right to choose in your life is the most basic part of my religion and always has been. It makes me sick that those dirty old men twisted doctrine around and made new stuff up until it became part of getting into heaven to let a old lecher knock you up. There couldn't be anything more wrong to me.

Thinking about it makes all kinds of words I'm not supposed to say because I'm LDS come into my head. I become filled with the urge to beat someone. I want to be a lawyer just so I can prosecute them and lock them up. I used to work for a domestic violence shelter and I am very very sensitive to the topic of abuse. No fundamentalist better try to get ANY sympathy from me and play off our shared origins of religion. Our religions couldn't BE more different. They might have come from alien pods for all the common ground we share if they don't acknowledge the prophet and they abuse kids. Nuff said.

So anyways it's getting late and I have tests coming up. I probably shouldn't rage endlessly on this topic, but I had to say- LOCK THOSE BASTARDS UP!!!!!!!

If I know Texas as well as I think I do.......we so will.

So this was the famous Edward Ferrars I melted over last week. So hot in tonight's show. He's like an 1800's Jim Halpert. Those evil people at PBS made dating profiles of each Austen Hero on the pbs.org site. That's a little too 12 year old girl for me, but it provided this pic for your viewing pleasure.

So anyways. Um HUGE NEWS!! A new version of A Room with a View Next Week!!!! HOLY SCHNIKIES!!! How did I not know about this???!!! One of my favorite....everything's of all time is being remade and I didn't know? I might have missed it!!! I am sooo all over that. I am also totally in the mood to watch the old version. ARGG!!!! It can never be as good as Merchant Ivory made it. I'm just saying.
So back to the original thought process. Although I appreciate them making it all Jane Austen for the past two months on PBS, I still like the other Sense and Sensibility better. The Emmas are debatable. Each has merits. Mansfield Park movies have all sucked in general. Persuasion.....eh. The new Northanger Abbey(and only one) is pretty darn cute. But my point is ..umm....thanks but why?
Do movies really need to be remade every few years for a new audience? I would tend to say ...NO(heck to the no for the less righteous readers). I am not a fan in general of remakes. Little Women......it had been a LOOONG time. I can see trying to get a new non black and white film watching audience. Pride and Prejudice, now that's a whole other story.....see the production pissed me off by starting with the theme of not " this movie needs a remake" but "We need to remake classic brit films with Keira Knightley because they will make money". True story. It made me sick when I heard it years ago in pre-production. The end product ...is actually not that bad. I LOVE Jena Malone as Lydia. But I had serious hesitations. Who in their right mind thinks the A&E miniseries is not the be-all end-all of Pride and Prejudice? It fulfills my every Jane Austen need. Who thinks watching a repressed Colin Firth is irrelevant to today's watchers? Not anyone I know!! The sheer gall to watch P&P and think to yourself the only thing this is missing is Keira Knightley! FREAKS!! It is not missing anything but your brain power and any sense of culture, fine film, or literature. Moving on from the rage.......
Honestly my greatest fear is that they will start trying to remake my favorite classic films and it just shouldn't be done. Here is a little list of what will cause me to fall over and die of horror if they try to remake:
Gone with the Wind
My Fair Lady
The Thin Man
All the Doris Day/ Rock Hudsons (although they tried with Renee Zellweger and failed miserably- jerks haha)
The Sound of Music/ Mary Poppins (I forsee this happening.....with Disney greed behind it)
The Princess Bride/Goonies ( movies of sheer genius I know)
Life is Beautiful(I want the original in italian only- if they try to make a truly english version.....GRRR)
Grease(this is just a plea not to do that to us- ug)
Wow.....I am a regular AFI of quality film here. Majorly serious subject matter. Ha. Maybe I should add in Adventures in Babysitting and Clue. Anyways. Can you imagine if we live to see the day they feel the need to remake ET or Titanic? If they start remaking Schindler's List I might as well just sign out of the human race.
Ok. This was a bizarre post. But hopefully you could follow along.

The Totally Hat-tastic Blog

Saturday, April 5, 2008 |

Hey Fwiends! It's a less-drug-induced thought from your good old pal Erica!

Today Erika P. and I went hat shopping to get ideas for a class she is taking later on and had tons o' fun! I heart hats. I would never ever wear them in daily life....or ever really....but DANG IT... you all KNOW I love costumes. And I will totally take any costume type opportunity to wear a crazy hat. They really seem to define characters so well. Take my Mrs. Peacock teardrop shaped 40's style number that I made myself. It rocked. I won the Clue costume contest and I give all the credit to the hat.

Today Erika P and I rocked Steinmart and Nordstrom Rack. Really the only stores we could think of with hats. So here are a few of my fave selections. I am putting ones of me as I have my own full permission to humiliate myself. I am putting my fave Erika P hat though at the end. Cause she looks so pretty she shouldn't mind.

Here is the many colored green slouchy hat. If I had bought a hat....this would be the one. You know I love green. And that it was slightly slouchy and many shades..... with a big flowah!! Hold me back!

Here is the Cruella De Ville hat. I was trying to look Ferocia Coutura obviously unsuccessfully. Yikes. Once again. How many times do I need to learn the lesson that sucking in the cheeks/= evil cheekbones. ARGH. Just looks like a I need a straw . Truly this hat needs a unspeakably fatal(black) outfit to bring it out. I wish I had thought of dressing up in a neutral palette for our trip instead of in the Erica-standard green+brown hoodie.

I hearted this hat too. I was like totally channeling Gatsby characters in this hat. It almost gives me an angelic glow if you will. Like maybe the thoughts inside that head aren't pure e-vil fr-uits of the de-vil. Ting! That's me flicking my halo!

And finally Erika P. Isn't this hat awesome! It's very feminine and flowy. But not huge. I have to admit I was all about the drama of the hats, but this was cute and simple. And Erika has dimples which make it look even more innocent than my hats. Not fair!
I really need to keep my camera with me more. I think I need to document all the hats I see from now on. Cause hat pics are FU-UN!!! Totally a party on your head!

From the Sickbed

Wednesday, April 2, 2008 |

Ok peeps. This will probably be disjointed and badly typed. Why? I am sick and on the good kind of drugs. Oh yeah.

For anyone who wants gruesome details ask me later and I'll tell you. It all involves me and my infection prone throat. And probably the lack of sleep in my previous bloggy.

So ......soft food is pretty darn boring. Soup gets old fast. After having been sick like 3 times in the past 2 months I am also already over popsicles. I am not over smoothies however, YUM!

I have once again exhausted all the resources of my DVR. Holy crud? How can it be that I am sick yet again AND have already blogged on this grievance in the past AND the writers are not striking anymore and I am still TV SHOW LESS!!!!!! This is a crime. All I have to say is bless you Richardson Public Library and bless me too for always checking out far more DVDs and books than I can read or watch in a week. Except a week like this. Although what I will actually remember from Monday and Tuesday ......and maybe this afternoon is questionable.

I have to give props to PBS who has not let me down in the search for new shows. The only things I have to watch right now are new episodes of Signing Time (yay for more annoying signs that I can barely do and will likely forget!!) and the new Andrew Davies version of Sense and Sensibility from Masterpiece Theater. Bless them. And bless their Edward Ferrars who is babe-liscious. I mean come on.....Emma Thompson's version is like perfection...and the other characters pale in comparison to all of Emma's cast. But this Edward can boot out Hugh Grant for the role any day in my book. Heck......I'd go so far as to say that the new Edward Ferrars could come and visit me right now and brighten up a sick girl's day. But he'd have to be blindfolded so he couldn't see me in my sickie-ness. But oooooooooooie!! He is one fine hunk of british male. I highly esteem him.

Another note from the sickbed. I love cell phones. My sister doesn't right now because I keep calling her from my bedroom, but it's much better than having to shout. I'm all

Erica: What up homez?
Kris: What do you want now?
Erica: Isn't this cool that I can call you on the phone?
Kris: No, stop calling me. What do you want?
Erica: Just to ask if you can go get mom.
Kris: Wasn't I just in your room?
Erica; Yeah but I forgot and I don't want to listen to her phone ring for 30 minutes till she finds it so can you just go get her?
Kris: Don't call me again.

Thus we see why I want to be a nurse and ......she doesn't.

Now I am able to get up and go seek mom myself though so the phone stage is technically over. Fun while it lasted though. I am totally calling her all the time now when she is next door. Just for giggles.

OK- Now it's wayyy late and I am ready to sleep for a million more hours. Nighty night bloggy!